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Londo Mollari of the House Mollari does not have, or use, „lame excuses“. This is a vile slander spread by that pest of a woman, my former wife Daggair, in retaliation for our divorce. Bah.

Very well. I shall tell you the truth, yes? On the day I before married Daggair, something my father had insisted on since my marriage to Timov had not produced an heir yet, and besides had left him with the idea he had to prove that he could gain a noble wife for his son after having sold him for the rich one, on that day I enjoyed one of the universes more pleasant distractions; to wit, a came of cards. All games of chance are a challenge, but the true adventurer does not let himself be contained by something as dreadfully boring as any given set of rules. I have always seen it as my personal obligation to prove my creativity in this regard.

Unfortunately, I had a worthy opponent on that particular occasion. He anticipated a certain move I have since stopped using against Centauri. (The other races are another matter, especially the humans. They tend to assume because we look very much like them, our anatomy is identical as well. Why the Maker would have limited us to the one single attribute he gave them, I do not know, but there it is. Most of them still have not realized that we have six.) Alas, the way he chose to foil the move in question was to sit on my third brachiarte on the right, which had been engaged in collecting a card I thought I had a better use for than he did. He did not say anything, but he remained sitting where he was for the rest of the game.

Now, as opposed to a certain less than… balanced individual in a position of high rank, I never had any pretensions to divinity. Of course I ached through the next two or three days. And during my wedding night with Daggair, I might have said something to the effect that my failure to engage all six was not caused by a lack of charms on her side. I wanted to soothe the woman’s vanity, for gods’ sake!

Let this be a warning to every husband, especially in a marriage of convenience. Do not try to explain at all, eh? It only results in your former wife telling all and sunder that you used a “lame excuse” afterwards, and you’ll have to prove the agility of your attributes for the rest of your life.


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July 2010

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